Its the third week in January. It is also the point where optimistically made new year's resolutions begin to fall away as people fall back into old routines. I'm sure on December 31st you really were going to start going to the gym every day but that was before you actually had to go to the gym everyday. I'm one of those people who despite hopes and vain promises never keeps up with my promises. That's why I only made one resolution this year; wear black nail polish. Its always intimidated me because I didn't think it was something I could pull off. On one end of the spectrum I was afraid it make me look like I was trying to be "punk" and mysterious. I was also afraid of the chance that people would think that I was trying too hard. I'm five foot four with a style thats a mix between preppy and indie, black nails aren't something that I associated with myself. So I've always strayed away from total black opting instead for gray or navy, refusing to fully commit.
New years is a time for change. I had a partyto go to this ear and i planned to wear a black dress, black shoes, why not have black nails as well. What exactly was holding me back.I decided to crack the plastic seal on the bottle of "midnight sky" and took the leap. Nail polish is superficial and in the longterm its meaningless. However as soon as i painted my nails i felt an immediate attitude shift. Black nails made me feel strong.Each time I saw my hand I felt confident, powerful. It stopped mattering to me what other people thought and it actually made me happy. It started to get me thinking about other times I've let my decisions be influenced by my fear of judgement. Many times I've refrained from saying something or doing something because of the way it would make others see me. I've missed out on several opportunities because of my fear of judgement. If something so simple as the color on my fingertips makes me happy, why wouldn't I embrace it? Why not just say yes to what makes me happy? So my new year resolution is to do what makes me happy, even if its as basic as black nail polish.